July 2010
2 posts
Sunday recipe!
Dismantle a head of broccoli and a head of cauliflower, and scatter the pieces of both around on a cookie sheet with a chopped onion. Slop some olive oil on there. Add salt, pepper, paprika, and crushed garlic. Industrial strength rubber band to taste. Roast at as high as your oven will go until you remember to turn it off. Take a super crappy picture of your creation, and leave it on stovetop...
June 2010
7 posts
Dispatch from Daniele
Report from Port Townsend, WA: I’m at an exact replica of a 50’s diner drinking a Cherry Phosphate Soda! Liquid phosphate added to make it extra carbonated. Heaven in a glass!
[Editor’s note: Daniele is usually MUCH snarkier than this. Either Washington or this soda is agreeing with her. We’ll have a phosphate party upon her return as a controlled experiment.]
me: totally, dude! what are you doing tonight? KK: hmm gotta go to target get some supplies then unpacking. making tacos! me: nice! with alex? how’s domestic life?
KK: haha pretty normal. clean. he made me bfast this am! its fun! i stay up till 12 which is huge me: that’s major. i have not gone to sleep before 2am in 2 months. so fucked. not my style at all. you should buy some of...
The summer after freshman year of college, I went with my father and sister to Montana, where an uncle (or something?) has a “dude ranch” outside of Bozeman. For some reason, we didn’t stay with him but rather at the house of some friends of my grandparents. There were a lot of Navajo rugs, tooled leather chairs, casually strewn cow skulls, and even a Cornell box on the mantle. I spent the week...
May 2010
8 posts
Wonderland
Sometimes, I’m just in the mood for a little cognitive dissonance. But since I’m never really in the mood to take drugs, I’ve come up with some great/safe alternatives that involve merely observing hilariously sized things: 8 oz Poland Spring bottles, those to-go margaritas from the Turkey’s Nest that people drink in McCarren Park, Lara Bars.
Half B'day
…and the fast was broke with this sick mini-donut. It tasted of lemon, graham crackers and still being Krayzie Bone after all these 23.5 years.
FYI
We’ve been on a religious fast since May 7th in observance of Molly’s half-birthday (today!). So that’s why we haven’t really been posting anything.
JK
Satisfied a completely unprecedented craving today: blueberry bagel with cream cheese. It was OK. Whatever.
Union Market rivals babysitting when it comes to self-induced stomach aches. I end up sampling everything in the store/family’s kitchen three times and go home feeling horrible but also that I “got my money’s worth.”
April 2010
18 posts
Reader Submission: Billie's Freezer
Like a world’s fair, the best of the various best is represented in Billie’s freezer (hot cross buns! cheap white bread! gluten/yeast/sugar free lemon and olive oil coconut maracrons!). We’re also vibing with Billie’s “slight preoccupation with hippie foods” and “great excuse to bake creatively.”
Here is the fridge inventory: 3 blue swimmer crabs...
Magic cookies, part III
This is part III of a probably endless procession of posts devoted to the magic cookies (see parts I and parts II). We were very happy to receive this email and delightful iPhoto from Anna Sobolewska!
Hello dear editors of Salad & Candy!
This here is my interpretation of Molly’s cookie recipe :) Please consider the fact that I don’t bake, this was my first ever attempt at...
$3 beers at our most favorite dive bar
And free food. It is heaven.
Tikki tikki tembo no sa rembo chari bari ruchi pip...
Before Molly and I were soulmates, we were friends. And our friendship was triangulated by her little brother, Ned. We all know young children should never be allowed to play in groups of three, even when two are siblings. Someone was always left out: I was excluded because I was not kin, Ned was excluded because he was a boy, and Molly was excluded because she got so moody. When we did get along...
Deli on 3rd and 51st Street
Literally the most mediocre sandwich I have ever eaten. Soggy lettuce and tomato with Swiss cheese and turkey on a croissant. $7.50.
How do corporate people do it? And why?
Shipshape
Cream cheese frosting for breakfast— from a giant tub, eaten with a ladle. Look out, New York!
Oh! Look, Dickon - how queer!
This nutritional bar is quick.
Always ask a date to take you to Dallas BBQ
Start with a frozen sour apple martini or a pineapple crush with coconut Ciroc shooter.
Proceed to popcorn shrimp.
Wings are optional, yet preferred.
Clockwise from left: apricot nectar, agua, Pisco Sour.
Those uninitiated to the Pisco Sour should get acquainted. Fresh lime juice, simple syrup, Pisco brandy, egg white and a splash of bitters on top. So good!
Jeremy Scott - get on this, yo!
Like Natalie, we too might “try making the cranberry candle when bored.”
Toasting the end of a tough day with a rough snack
"Far worst of all, the fever had settled in Mary's...
I was glad to see my favorite Brooklyn dad, Pete Wells, on the subject of Laura Ingalls Wilder, who I blame/thank for my obsession with food. The eight Little House books (don’t even talk to me about that posthumous rag, The First Four Years) comprised 90% of my grade school reading. I came back to them again and again. Indelible images include: Laura and Mary pouring maple syrup onto fresh...
March 2010
31 posts
6 tags
Discovery
Cross-section of pecan pie Läräbär lööks like a terrine.
Reader Submission: Lou's Freezer
Lou’s freezer is a pleasant jumble of chicken-themed ingredients, icey poles (hehe) and something called a “fruit loaf”, which sounds like something Miss Havisham would keep locked up in a dusty closet somewhere!
Behold:
What’s inside:
ice
frozen calamari
empty ‘icey pole’ (popsicle) bag
loaf of bread
filo pastry
pizza bases
bottle of Tanqueray...
Magic Cookies, Fennoscandian Edition
Our friend Siiri in Finland made the magic cookies!!
WatchCan you see what’s going on here? Is it the acid (?) in Celestial Seasonings True Blueberry tea that separates almond milk in this way, turning creamy liquid into what looks like soap flakes? Reminds me of the champagne flute-zoom in the opening credits of Father of the Bride.
4 tags
Two links
Obligatory Blanche Blogging
A rich and rewarding assembly of associations from the Minor Tough. Fuck a jive translator, I want to sic a Fritz translator on the world.
Choire’s Retarded Pizza
NICE TOMATO PLACEMENT, DORK!! jkjkjkjkjkjkjkjkjk
Mother's "Tiger's Milk" Cookies
Here’s a cookie recipe that is foolproof, delicious, and chock-full of 1960s health foods: wheat germ, oats, dried apricots, protein powder. It produces glossy brown lumps that smell and taste like the sum total of all earthly baked goods. It is easy to picture Joan Baez reclining in a knoll with a basket of these, or Joni Mitchell interrupting a dulcimer jam session for a nourishing bite or...
1 tag
Nutmeg pastry
Take note
Molly displayed some really noble restraint today when she opted against photographing the weird bug she found suspended in her Jello.
TIP
Cream of Wheat tastes like a liquid biscuit if you put enough butter on it.
My most mortifying habits are the result of not having an iPhone - like when I accidently text gibberish that only I would understand as a Twitter idea to Molly instead of myself and she replies, “WTF?”
Another good example was when I woke up today, went to make myself breakfast, noticed these, and realized what a good Punk’d I could pull: Oh no! The mouse is back!
I still...
Two linky-dinks
KitKats of the world (courtesy of Gia)—a survey of Kit Kat varieties that includes queer surprises like “Strawberry & Nuts” and “Bean” flavors.
Cooking the Books with Sam Lipsyte and Ceridwen Morris—Emily Gould’s cooking show, specifically an episode in which placenta, death row and pork buns all get equal time.
Try it you'll like it
Last week I accidentally invented the best cookies in the world. The recipe has been tested by my mother, sniffed by the cat and approved by both.
Send us a picture if you make them!
The Rolling Stones’ Brown Sugar Shack: Where you can’t always get what you ordered